Lynch Mob Rebel

LYNCH MOB, the band led by former DOKKEN guitarist George Lynch, will release its eighth studio CD, "Rebel", on August 21 via Frontiers Music Srl. The effort was produced by Lynch collaborator Chris "the Wizard" Collier.

The LYNCH MOB lineup on "Rebel" is comprised of Lynch, Oni Logan on vocals, Jeff Pilson (ex-DOKKEN, FOREIGNER, DIO) on bass and Brian Tichy (ex-WHITESNAKE, OZZY OSBOURNE) on drums.

01. Automatic Fix
02. Between The Truth And A Lie
03. Testify
04. Sanctuary
05. Pine Tree Avenue
06. Jelly Roll
07. Dirty Money
08. The Hollow Queen
09. The Ledge
10. Kingdon Of Slaves
11. War

Recipe for Lynch Mob’s “Jelly Roll”

4 well-knownish hair metal musicians, separated

3/4 cup familiar, bluesy riff, sifted

3/4 teaspoon lyrics about being too horny to do domestic chores

1/4 teaspoon lyrics using a pastry as a metaphor for sex à la Warrant’s “Cherry Pie”

Shreddy guitar leads for dusting, sifted

1 cup nostalgia, stirred well

Whipped cream

Preheat oven to 1987 degrees F.

In a small studio beat musicians until they remember it’s this or work at Denny’s and set aside. Gradually add the shreddy leads. Sift together the lyrics. Mix well. Bake for 3:31 or until George Lynch looks thirty again.

Loosen edges, invert onto a towel dusted with confectioners’ cocaine. Gently peel revitalizing skin mask. Watch George Lynch trim 1/4-inch tape, remind him no one works with tape anymore. Cool on Best Buy rack for 10 to 15 minutes. Move to bargain bin. Cover with whipped cream. Voilà!